Ashes to Ashes... Dust to Dust!

Have you ever tasted ashes?

Ashes in your mouth!

Have you ever tasted dust?

Groveling in your own tears!

From the ashes she rose…

Each time like a Sphinx!

And each time they pulled her down…

And they promised her the magical land…

As the demons raped her soul each time!

And they promised her the golden bird…

As they left her alone to play with their Angels…

One more step and she would reach…

And on and on she walked…

And she never stopped walking!

‘I have no time’, he said,

As he turned to play with another

‘Let it go’, she told herself each time

And they promised her the throne of Queen…

As her dress wore ruins and her hair wore moth!

She walked on tired,

Tired of all their lies,

And she wondered why she even asked…

While all she was meant to be was…

Ashes to Ashes… Dust to Dust!

And so she sat there near the pond…

Away from all their promises…

Slowly growing tired to death…

Fading into her own Ashes and Dust!

And then there were none!

She strummed pausing chords on the guitar,

A cigarette dangling on her lips loosely,

The room lay dimly lit in silence,

Smoke bellowing above the old couch.

She poured herself another drink,

Counts of lost lovers gone in each sip,

Her fingers lightly touching the wounds again,

She looks to the glass ceiling on to the stars.

Brightly lit candles give her company,

She sits after a sold out night,

Looking dazzling in her indifference,

In an empty room of scotch and cigarettes.

Laughter of innumerable voices,

Now lost to the grieving room,

Soul sold off to the highest bidder,

An artist’s voice now on hire.

First went the music…

Then it was the lovers…

And then the dazzle…

And then there was None!

It’ll be over soon

He held me still by the arms…

Running his hands through my hair…

Bringing them down to my lips…

A tear crawling to his fingers…

His body pushing me farther behind,

His lips on my neck,

I tried to scream,

I knew he couldn’t hear me now.

Tearing my innocence,

With his bare hands and skin,

He looked at me for a moment,

He held me close, so still.

Lost in his trance state,

He forced himself on me,

The curtains flying to the breeze,

Red covered my wounds.

I stopped trying to run away…

I moved to scars as I held him…

I heard him smile…

‘Don’t rape me’, another tear fell…

He had whispered to me then,

‘It’ll be over soon’

It isn’t… It never will be…

What I didn't tell you

All you know is... All I told you

Here's a few not so wise things I learnt in this crazy, smiling mess of a life... I say them out loud... Only cos I cannot take them back then...

Things that scare you are the ones worth talking about the most...

Never say no to a new experience... 

Be promiscuous with your experiences... Not with your mind

Want! Never need!

Be honest with your opinions... Those who stick around are the ones meant to

There should only be one reason to be with someone for life... Love

Love is what you define for yourself

Your body is not a temple... It is a gift!

Timing is nothing... Intention is everything

The world needs more kindness and less money

Know the world around you... Even more so the world inside you

Say the things you think without sugarcoating

Define your standards... Stop following the ones they defined

People will try to control you... Let them... Then let go

Travel makes you more open than anything else

Travel is a way of life... Not an easy one

Figure out who you are before you figure who you want

Everything is a choice

Be the absolute version of yourself... No customizations!

Shame

She stood by the corner between the light and haze,

Looking at the room fill in and empty out…

She looked at them together in her mind,

Falling like domino pieces in air.

Sipping her tea slowly,

She tugged harder at her skirt.

Her short legs exposed as she walked,

She pushed her socks down.

Moving her head to the numbing sound,

Sounds of laughter dancing to the music…

A hand pulling her by the waist,

She came face to face with him.

Dancing to the rhythm of our bodies,

His lips pushed against my skin hard,

He whispered in my ear lightly,

‘I can’t believe I haven’t met you yet.’

I pushed him back against the wall,

Trapped in passion enveloping us,

Liberated in that numb moment,

We let go in the garden of temptation.

‘You can think of him tonight’

He whispered in my ears.

I looked at him knowingly,

Another night, another stranger.

Born in the their wrong time,

Born in the their wrong place,

Born in the their wrong form,

Born every moment.

Love of a moment for every moment…

Higher than lust of one eternal moment…

Love lost in the wild greed,

Greed of another moment.

Shame in the love for greed,

Higher than lust of the material,

Not lost in the their need to stop,

No Shame...

To the Moon and Back

Tunes of another time

Of Love and Loss

Love of a night…

Lost in the daylight…

Tunes of another kind

Of Power and Greed

Power over self…

Greed to never stop…

Tunes of another life

Of a life forgotten

Life in a home…

Forgotten in the wild…

Tunes of another girl

Of a homeless world

Homeless by choice…

World of the wild…

Lost in the abyss

Of never knowing,

Kissed by the stars…

On the lips...

Found in the Garden of Eden,

Biting the apple…

From the snake’s mouth,

Kissed by the maker…

Lost in the web,

Of her making…

In love with…

Creatures of the Dark…

Found in the loss…

Found in every life…

Found in everything…

Lost when Found…

To every life at the same time…

To everything through nothing…

To every orgasm through every kiss…

To the Moon and back...

I Call it Magic

Sitting by a window pane,

Dreams about a life in dreams,

Rejecting time,

Broken between the real and the surreal.

I sit by the window still,

Looking at it all,

Looking at what I don’t want,

Looking at what I will never want.

And in their love and loss,

The fear of losing another one,

Greed of the broken winged,

Greed of a lost cause.

Passing through storms,

Lost and found,

Between the music and the musician,

Rhythm of the cursed…

No fear of the unknown,

Fear of the unspoken,

Big Realities…

Bigger Illusions…

Curiosity to a stranger,

From the unknown…

A life against rules of reality,

Moving to the surreal.

Dreams of another window pane…

Dreams of a swim in the open ocean…

Dreams of being lost in the surreal...

Dreams of a lost cause…

I sit by the window still,

Music of the free world,

Realities of a golden cage,

A life of taking flight.

Life as a circle…

In a square box…

I call it Magic…

I call it Truth…

Blue Jazz Nights

 Hues of orange surrounding the sky...

Darkness starting to creed in...

The glass door creaks open,

There I walked in.

You pushed a glass towards me,

Your fingers slowly  pulling on my scarf,

Warmth of your breath playing on my neck,

I push you back and turn to run.

Sitting by the river now...

Silence of the night...

Broken by the waves...

Walls of our own making...

Into each night and then again,

Beyond each hour and time,

 Veiled tears of grief and love,

Make me go weak in my knees.

Jazz music in this dingy pub,

The sultriness in the breeze,

I remembered him tonight,

I longed for a weakness.

Prayer flags in the sky...

Moaning amidst blurred lines...

The touch of a stranger...
Kissing under the stars...

Dancing on toes all night...

Blue Jazz nights... Into abyss

Jumping between Extremes

Walking into the unknown…

The mist around the glass…

The haze of smoke dancing around…

A slight chill in the breeze…

The screen blinks on to life…

A slight smile spreads…

I look upon the stars…

The colours of life flush in…

I throw tantrums…

I cry anger…

I frown upon the sky…

And then, I laugh…

And this night is different,

And this sky looks darker,

And tonight is a new night,

Between the start and the end.

Demons amidst the mist…

Letting go of the whisky…

Letting in the circles of haze…

My fingers start to dance in the sky…

My hair opens loose…

Naked shoulders breathing in…

Dancing to the Nightcall…

Kissing in the air…

Accent of the chill around…

Dewdrops on my lips…

Pushed against the wall…

My hands crushed in…

Moving amidst the unknown…

Demons of a life around me…

Nightcall of a stranger…

Withdrawal symptoms aplenty…

Greed breathing me in stronger…

I make peace with my own fiction…

He smirks from six feet and beyond…

Lost and found in between the lines…

I start pacing back,

I change the tune,

I kiss the fire around,

I move with the rain.